Ryan B reads Poetic Justice

Ah, Valentine's Day. 

A day where we are encouraged to share our hearts with our one true love, whether they want it or not.

In my case that "one true love" would be the beautiful Sabrina Spellman from the next town over. That bewitching beauty has had my heart since I was a young boy, and this Valentine's Day I'm finally going to show her how I feel. I just have to get that Harvey guy out of the way first.

So while I do that, why don't you enjoy this heart pumping tale from The Haunt of Fear #12...

Ryan B reads A Little Stranger

 It's been a wild broom ride, kids, but here we are, the end of Witchuary.

And what better way to wrap up this enchanting month than by going back to the beginning?

Whose beginning, you ask?

Let's find out. 

From The Haunt of Fear #14, drawn by Graham Ingels, this story will put some wolfsbane in your blood...

Ryan B reads How To Win A Witch

Witchuary continues with a tale brought to you by the third and final of DC's three witches, the beautiful and groovy young witch, Cynthia. 

This story is pretty much Bewitched and I Dream Of Jeannie combined. It's from issue #26 of The Witching Hour and goes a little something like this...

Ryan B reads I Died Last Night

Hey, fear freaks!

Witchuary continues with a tale from yet another of The Witching Hour's three witches. This time it's Mordred, the oldest and saltiest member of the coven who brings you a story from 1973's issue #34. It's written by George Kashdan and drawn by Rico Rival and is about an obituary writer who gets too involved in his work.

But I'll let Mordred tell you all about it...

Ryan B reads When Satan Comes A-Creeping

Howdy, delinquents!

Witchuary continues with a story from yet another book and host that has never graced this blog before. The Witching Hour was one of many horror anthology titles put out by DC Comics in the 1970's along with others such as The House of Mystery and The House of Secrets. 

The book featured three storytelling witches who lived in a spooky castle with their hideous (yet never seen) servant named Egor. This tale from issue #18 is told by Mildred, the plump, middle aged of the three witches and concerns a man, a woman, and of course... Satan.

Enjoy.

Ryan B reads The Boy Who Cried Vampire

With the new year comes new fear, so I thought we'd kick of Witchuary here at Comic Book Crud by looking at a story from a book that we haven't ever covered before on this blog.

In 1972 Archie Comics (yes, THAT Archie Comics) decided to get in on the horror comic game that was just starting to become profitable again following the comics code authority's war on fright mags, and what they came up with was an anthology book along the same lines as Tales from the Crypt and The House of Mystery entitled, Chilling Adventures in Sorcery.

It was hosted by Sabrina Spellman, of The Teenage Witch fame (hubba, hubba), and drawn in the traditional Archie style by artist Stan Goldberg.

Was it scary?

Well, by some standards maybe. You certainly can't deny that it was risky. The stories regularly featured standard horror fare such as monsters, death, evil, and ironic or unhappy endings. Not the kind of stuff you'd typically find at Pop's Malt Shoppe.

I guess parents thought it was scary enough, because it only lasted for a handful of issues.

Okay, enough history. Today's story comes from issue #1 of Chilling Adventures in Sorcery and proves that if you're going to be a tattle tale you better have more bite than bark.

Take it away, Sabrina, you foxy little teenage dream...

Ryan B reads Elvira's Christmas Carol

Yay!

Christmas day has finally come and Santa brought me everything I asked for... after a little persuasion. Once I let him go and he flew out of sight, he shouted, "Merry Christmas to all!" and then took off in fright.

So since I'm in such a holly jolly mood today I decided to give you all a Christmas treat. A story featuring many of your favorite horror hosts including Cain, Abel, Destiny, and Elvira! There's even a special (sort of) appearance by Zacherly.

So here ya go, from Elvira's House of Mystery Christmas Special, it's a horrific twist on a classic Dickensian tale.

Ryan B reads Bless Us, Father...

Sooo

My Grandma got run over by a reindeer last night. 

It was pretty horrible actually. She was walking home from our house after her and my mom's weekly "eggnog party" that they always do in December, and from what we and the police can gather she must have been crossing the street when she was suddenly trampled by an escaped 200 pound reindeer from the local zoo.

I was the one who found the body the next morning while taking out the trash. There were hoof prints on her forehead and there was a ton of blood and gashes all over her body. Her head was also partially smashed in.

No one witnessed the accident (if it was in fact an accident) and the reindeer is still at large, so if anybody has any information, please call the Pleasant Hollow sheriffs department at Klondike 555-976-1313.

And now, from 1974's Creepy #59, story by Bill Dubay, art by Richard Corben, here's a bloody holiday romp yule just die for...

Ryan B reads Santa's Claws

Hey-o!

How are all you comic book creeps doing tonight, or today, or whenever the hell you're reading this?

Me, myself, and Tom are decorating my Christmas tree at the moment. My momma didn't think we should have one this year, because they cost too much money and she already blew the Christmas budget  on Arnold Stang albums, Yoohoo, and vodka for herself. I took care of it though, I borrowed this one from the Krelmoore's down the street. It just had lights on it when I got it, so me and Tom are improvising some ornaments. A shrunken head, some skeleton garland left over from Halloween, A voodoo doll on top instead of an angel. It looks boss so far.

Anyway, you didn't come here for my tree, you came here for horror comics, so while I get Tom's boney ass untangled from all this silver tinsel, why don't you check out this helladay treat from 1970's Web of Horror #3. It was drawn by Frank Brunner and written by my favorite scribe, Bruce Jones. 

Go on, Webster, weave us a tale...

Ryan B reads A Sock For Christmas

 

Well ho ho holy crap, it's Christmas once again!

Christmas is actually my favorite holiday right behind Halloween. It's a time when things seem just a little more bright. Particularly if you happen to fall asleep next to a roaring fire and accidentally roll in.

Don't laugh, it happened to a friend of a friend of a friend of my cousin.

Okay, you can laugh a little.

But really, Christmas is great. The lights, the songs, the smells. And there's no reason you can't get just as scared around Christmas as you can the rest of the year. In fact the cold darkness of winter is perfect for a tale of terror.

Oh look! Here's one of those now.

Straight from my old uncle's trunk full of horror comics comes this yuletide tide of gore from The Vault of Horror #29. It's written by Al Feldstein with art by Johnny Craig.

And where there's Johnny Craig you can be sure that The Vault-Keeper's not to far away. So take it away, Vaulty, what do ya have for us?

People Are Strange...

Ryan B reads A Sucker For A Spider

I hate spiders. I hate 'em!

They're the only thing that truly fills me with dread, and so I thought that today I would bare my deepest fear to you all and together we could delve into a twisted web of terror from Tales from the Crypt #29 featuring those disgusting little nasty monsters.

Drawn by the great "Ghastly" Graham Ingels and written, as usual, by the great Al Feldstein, here it is, take it away Old Witch!

Ryan B reads Holly's Hobby

 

Bruce Jones, you magnificent bastard! Only you could craft a story this good and do it in only four pages.

From Twisted Tales #7,  this chilling yarn features some great art by John Bolton and one hell of a twist. You might even say it puts the twist in Twisted Tales.

On second thought don't say that.

Just enjoy this little quickie which begins in medias res and discover the horrible secret behind...

Ryan B reads Reflection Of Death



 

As the old Crypt-Keeper has recently brought to my attention, it has been many a full moon since I covered a story from Tales from the Crypt. So, to avoid any personal loss of life or limb I suppose I should return to that place where I spent most of my misspent youth, The Crypt of Terror.

This evening’s offering is a little mind screw courtesy of Al Feldstein and Issue # 23 of Tales from the Crypt.

Take it away, Crypty...

Coming up next at Comic Book Crud...

So, I go to open the old comic book trunk in order to pick a new story to share with you creeps and who should be hiding inside, but...

Okay, okay, you do have a point, Crypty. I suppose I haven't ventured into the crypt since my very first post on here, so as a personal favor to you my next blog will be a tale from the crypt. Happy?

Ryan B reads Raise The Devil & The Worm Turns

 

Hey gang! Welcome to another scum filled spookapalooza edition of Comic Book Crud. For our last entry this Halloween season, me and Tom thought it would be a treat for all you delinquents out there if we gave you not one, but two jolting tales of terror in the Comic Book Crud tradition.

So, put on your Collegeville costumes, stuff your face with some razor blade filled Zagnut bars, and let's join good old Cain for a party at The House of Mystery already in progress...

Creepy VS. Eerie

From Creepy #9 

Ryan B does All Hallows

 

 

 

 

 

 

Welcome back to Comic Book Crud you horror comic fiends and delinquents. I am that hoodlum that your parents warned you not to play with, Ryan B.

 

Today we will be continuing the theme of Halloween that we started last time with The October Game and will be enjoying all throughout the month of October.

 

 

You all remember what it was like to trick or treat, right? Many of you still may even be doing it to spite being in your late twenties. You go to a house, ring the bell, say "trick or treat" threateningly to whoever answers, have goodies dropped into your sack, then you say "thank you" and walk away so you can go get the eggs and toilet paper and repay the goon for giving you a box of dental floss.

 

Yes, it's one of the greatest joys of childhood, and the subject of tonight's story. It's a fantastic piece of midnight madness from Twisted Tales #1. Written by the master, Bruce Jones, and drawn by the talented Tim Conrad, this is a tale that could only happen on...

 

Abel's Fables

From The House of Secrets #121

Ryan B does The October Game

 

 

 

 

 

Howdy there, my fellow delinquents. It's your old pal Ryan B here once again to present to you another story from one of my uncle's moldy old muck mags.

 

Since the season of the witch (October) is upon us now and Halloween is right around the CORONER, I thought it would be only too appropriate for me to give you all a little treat. Or is it a trick? You'll have to read it to find out.

 

It's a story from EC Comics' SHOCK SuspenStories #9 and it's adapted by editor Al Feldstein from a short story by none other than Ray Bradbury himself. The art is by EC veteran, Jack Kamen, and it'll no doubt put you in just the right mood for this holiday season.

 

Now, if you're ready, prepare to play the game...